RvB: The Remnant Chronicles
by Goateater
Summary: In a world, where the most important thing is a flag, two teams of different colour must fight to the death for the glory of their flag. Join our heroes in their adventures to wreak havoc across a box canyon or the galaxy.
1. Chapter 1: Why are they there?

_**I OWN NOTHING!**_

 _ **Everything belonged to Rooster Teeth.**_

A long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, in a box canyon somewhere, a place where two mighty teams try to kill each other over a flag?

"Hey."

"Yeah?"  
"Ever wonder why we're here?"

"Yes. Why?"

"I mean, don't you feel like you're being watched by something above? Or like we're in some sort of experiment conducted by aliens? Or that we're a part of God's grand scheme to do something?"

"Jaune."

"Yes Ren?"

"I think you're being paranoid over nothing."

*High above the cloud*

Mysterious being 1: "Hm, we've underestimated them, they're learning."

Mysterious being 2: "Rather amusing isn't it?"

Mysterious being 1: "Quite so."

As they continue watching our heroes, Jaune and Ren decided to talk about something else.

*Back to the box canyon*

"You know, the only reason I sign up for this is to make my family proud, by taking up arms and protect our world from the terrorist group known as 'Grimm', but now I'm stuck here fighting people in blue armour while I wear red. What about you Ren?"

"Well, I sign up so I can keep Nora out of harm's way."

"What are you talking about? She can totally take care of herself."

As he said that, a loud explosion can be heard across the empty canyon.

*BOOM*

Jaune suddenly jumped up.

"What was that?" Grabbing his gun, that was slung on his back, he proceed to scan the area for threats.

Ren then patted Jaune's back.

"That my friend, is Nora."

"Very funny, what did she do then? Play with our secret grenade stash?"

"Knowing her, that's exactly what she did."

"Right." Jaune dragged on the 't' for two second to make him sound as sarcastic as possible.

"Keep waiting." Ren ordered.

Right on cue, a girl with pink armour and scorch marks all over her armour, stepped out of their headquarter, one hand scratching her head and smiled the most innocent smile ever known to man.

"Hey guys, we might have a slight problem." The girl said.

"And what might that problem be?" Jaune asked

"Some blues snuck into our base and sabotage our secret grenade stash." As she said this Ren facepalmed at the obvious lie.

"They what?!" Jaune yelled, and Ren facepalmed again, harder than the last time at the stupidity.

"They snuck into…" But Ren interrupted her, "He heard you Nora, he just needs some times to think about it."

Nora: "K."

*Across the canyon, in the same base but with a different colour scheme*

"Hey look smoke!" Someone yelled excitedly, "Let's help them!"

"Ruby, they're our enemies, the less enemies we have, the faster we can get out of here." The blonde female next to Ruby said.

"Oh right," Ruby said with a slight chuckle, "Forgot about that."

An awkward silence soon followed after that comment.

…

…

"Yang?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you ever wonder why we're here?" Ruby asked trying to think up things to talk about.

"Nope." Yang bluntly replied.

"What? No 'someone is watching over me?' or 'virtual reality experiment?' or 'God's grand scheme for us?' or anything like that at all?"

Yang shaked her head at all of Ruby's attempts to try and make her to talk.

"You know why, dear sister?" Yang asked suddenly, and all Ruby can do is shaked her head at the sudden question.

"Because I know exactly why we're here, we're here because there's a red base over there," Yang then point at the direction of the red base, "and they're there because we have a blue base over here." Yang then pointed at the ground beneath her, "The only way we can leave this God forsaken place is to either kill the enemies first or let them smack us all the way to Kingdom Kong. **Or** we can just sit right **here** until we all starve to death or die by boredom. Whoop-dee-fucking-doo!" Yang angrily yelled while throwing her hands up in the air to emphasised her point.

"Hey! Language." Ruby frowned at the crude remark.

Yang then quickly calm down, "Sorry, it's frustrating sometime."

"I can relate with that." Ruby said with understanding.

Suddenly a new voice, that belonged to those rich snobby kids, yelled, "Hey! When you two are done, I need your help down here."

"Back to work I guess." Yang said with a sigh.

"Well, it was nice while it lasted." Ruby said with a smile, trying to lift the mood.

Before Yang could say anything, the new voice yelled, "RIGHT NOW!"

"Alright, alright, coming! Jeez. You heard the lady let's go!"

Ruby and Yang then quickly grabbed everything that belonged to them , and ran to meet the owner of the 'rich snobby kid' voice.


	2. Chapter 2: Naming time!

_**I OWN NOTHING!  
EVERYTHING BELONGED TO ROOSTER TEETH. **_

In the same galaxy far far away, where two mighty teams try to kill each other over flags, blah blah blah, you get the idea, let's get this show on the road.

When Yang and Ruby finally reached their supposed destination, they were immediately bombarded by insults and abuses by a girl wearing a light blue armour or was it cyan? Aqua-marine? To this day Yang and Ruby still questioned the colour of their team mate's armour.

"Unbelievable! You two are twenty-five seconds late! I can't believe that the proud Blue army would stoop that low!" The girl with the mysterious armour said.

"Whatever you say Weiss-icicle." Yang said with a smirk, she knew that her team mate hated that nickname.

"The things I will do to make you forget that horrid nickname." Weiss muttered under her breath.

"What was that?"

"Nothing," Weiss said with a sad sigh, "I was wondering about whether we should ask command for a new team mate. All we have is a Spanish speaking robot, and you two."

Right after Weiss finished her sentence, a girl with short curly orange hair, bright green eyes, and almost visible freckles across her face, spoke behind her.

"Saludos Weiss(Salutations Weiss)," The strange robot girl spoke in a voice that was filled with excitement, "Estoy aquí para informar de que, lo he arreglado el vehículo del equipo.(I'm here to report that, I've fixed the team's vehicle.)" The girl finished her report, but as usual no one was able to understand a single thing that came out of her mouth.

"Are you saying that you're done fixing the Warthog?" Ruby asked, for some reasons Ruby was the only one who can guess what the robot girl said, with a ninety-five percent chance of guessing correctly.

'One mystery at a time.' Yang and Weiss both thought at the same time.

"¿Jabalí? Pensé que su nombre era Puma(Warthog? I thought its name was Puma)" The robot questioned outloud, without realising that it has said its thought outloud.

Ruby then snickered, "Puma? What's that? Some sort of big cat?"

"Sí, también es conocido como león de montaña, pantera y el puma.(Yes, it's also known as mountain lion, panther and cougar.)" The robot replied, earning a weird look from Ruby.

"Anyway," Ruby said, clearly not wanting to dwell on that matter, "Our beloved car still don't have a name..."

"You want to name a car?" Weiss questioned the sanity of her team mate.

"So Operation: 'Name the vehicle', is now in full effect." Ruby continued on, ignoring Weiss question, and then she promptly sat down with her legs crossed and a finger on her lips, thinking really hard.

"How about 'The Gears'?" Yang suggested.

"What will you think up next? 'Bumblebee'?" Weiss said with a small laugh.

"Oh, I like that name, we should paint it black and yellow too, so it matches the name." Yang squealed excitedly, eager to make it a reality.

"Oh how about 'Solar Esclipse'?!" Ruby excitedly yelled.

"Meh, pass." Yang said with a wave of her hand.

"WhiteRose?"

"No."

"Strawberry Sunrise?"

"Never in a million year! That name is out of this world weird."

"Nuts and Dolts?"

"Where did you get these weird names?" Yang questioned.

"I don't know," Ruby replied, "Oh how about 'Arkos'!" Ruby suddenly yelled excitedly.

Suddenly rain started falling around them, "I don't know Rubes, something about that name, just makes me sad." Yang commented before running inside their base.

*Across the canyon*

"Jaune! Where are you?!" Ren yelled outloud.

"Hey Ren." Jaune replied, appearing behind him.

"Hey you okay? One moment you were happy and laughing and the next you ran like you've seen a ghost." Ren asked, as worries oozed out of him, "You know, if you have a problem, Nora and I are here for you, we're a team after all." Ren stated.

"I know, it's just that I'm remembering things right now, I want to be alone for a bit."

"As you wish." Ren said as he backed away slowly.

*Back to the Blue base*

"As I said, before this," Ruby then point at the outside of the base using her thumb, "Arkos!?" She squeaked as thunder rolled across the canyon.

"As I said before, it makes me feel sad, so no." Yang then point at the outside of the base, "It also did that, so God must be really unhappy about that name."

"Fine, How about 'The Going Merry'?"

"Me gusta bastante ese nombre.(I quite like that name.)" The robotic girl finally commented after staying quiet for a while.

"Me too." Weiss added without knowing what was happening.

"¿Tu me entiendes?(You understand me?)" The robot questioned Weiss, but was ignored as a result.

"So it's decided! Our car will now be known as 'The Going Merry'" Ruby declared, in order to stop the robotic girl from asking anymore question.

*Back to the Reds*

"Hey Ren."

"Yes Jaune?"

"Do you think that everything is suddenly too quiet?" Ren then looked at him like he has grown a second head.

"I mean, yeah, there's Nora, and she's loud as heck, but now for some reasons, it seemed a little lonely." Jaune corrected himself.

"What do you suggest then? We can't really befriend the enemies."

"What?! No, I'm saying that we should get a new team member."

*Meanwhile*

"You know what will make this special occasion even better?" Everyone then looked at Ruby, "We need someone else to share the love!" She yelled while pumping one of her tiny fist in the air. Everyone except the robot girl looked at Ruby weirdly.

*Back to Red base*

"Oh, I can agree with that."

"Right? I'm sure that Nora will be happy with it too."

"She's never unhappy." Ren stated.

"Wait really?"

"If you see Nora unhappy, run for your life." Ren warned.

"It's that bad?"

"Yes." Ren replied bluntly.

"Anyway, what do you think about a new team mate."

"Well, it is nice to have a new face around here, hopefully he or she will be normal."

"I'm not normal?"

"No, you're the most normal around here."

"The enemies?"

"One of them said that they will kill us for the glory of cookies." Ren answered.

"Oh yeah, forgot about that incident."

"All I'm saying is that you should go for it."

"So the story for getting the rookie?"

"Say that some guy named Joe Johnson, died trying to defend the flag."

"Wow, you think fast."

"If you hang out with Nora long enough, you'll learn to think on the spot."

"Going to pretend I didn't hear anything so I don't have to ask questions and think about it later." And with that Jaune quickly ran off to make the call.


	3. Chapter 3: Teammate?

_I OWN NOTHING!  
EVERYTHING BELONGED TO ROOSTER TEETH._

In a box canyon far far away, our heroes now do the most unthinkable thing ever known to humanity, waiting.

"When will our new team mate be here?" Nora whined loudly, "We've been out here for decades already."

"You can say that again." Jaune agreed with her.

"I swear, we are the most immature soldiers, of all time." Ren complained.

*Across the canyon*

"Soooo llllllloooooonnnnnngggggggg!" Ruby yelled at the sky, "Why can't you show some mercy and send me a present?"

"Ruby, first the sky can't hear you, second we have been here for about ten minutes." Weiss stated.

"But it feels like centuries!" Yang started protesting, "Why can't God show mercy and make it rain?"

Weiss then looked at Yang weirdly, "You might want to rephrase that sentence."

*Back to the Reds*

"Want to play I Spy?" Jaune asked, "Since there's nothing to do."

"Oh I'll go first!" Nora shouted, "I spy with my little eyes, something starting with, **a shooting star**!"

"A what?" Jaune asked.

"Nora, that is not a letter." Ren calmly said.

"No! Look!" Nora then pointed at the sky yelling, "A REAL SHOOTING STAR!"

"Nor-" Ren said but he was interrupted.

*BOOM*

*At the Blue base*

"OH MY GOD!" Ruby happily squealed, "The sky answered me!"

"Usted es el creador de Ruby derecha.(You are right creator Ruby.)" The robot girl said with awe.

"Was that a meteor?" Weiss enquired.

"Mother of God, the sky rained, although it's not what I was expecting." Yang frowned at the scene before her.

"Anyway let's check it out before the Reds beat us to it." Weiss commanded.

Immediately Ruby, Yang and Weiss all grabbed their own special weapon and headed off towards the crash site.

*The Red base*

After a brief silence of shock, Jaune was the first to spoke, "Um… Did everyone see that or am I dreaming?"

"You're not dreaming." Ren uttered while Nora was jumping around yelling, "I'm not wrong! I'm not wrong! I can finally be Queen of the castle!"

Jaune then gave Ren a look that was filled with confusion at Nora's outburst.

"Let's check it out!" Ren quickly blurted out, not wanting to answered Jaune's question.

"Yeah, let's! Also Renny! Don't forget!" Nora happily cried out.

In an instant, they grabbed their weapons and sprinted at the direction of the crash.

*In Ruby's mind*

This. Is. The. Best. Day. Ever! First the sky answered me, by sending me something to keep me from dying because of boredom… I wonder what will it be? A seven feet tall monster with really cool weapons? Or it's an alien with four jaws and a really badass armour? Oh maybe it's a cookie monster? Oh God, please let it be a cookie monster… Alrightyo, we're here now, let's see what is hidden among the dust. I see three outlines of people, OH MY GOD! All of my wishes came true. Wait! No, it's just our enemies, LAME! I wonder why they wear different colour armour, one's lightish red, the other's green and the last one is wearing a light yellow armour, I think. I never really notice much about them, since we're trying to kill each other and all. I mean I can't judge them since we're not really following the uniform rules, Yang wear a bright yellow armour, while I wear a red armour with a picture of a rose engraved on it. Hey don't judge, everyone have their own personal preference, and Weiss wear a mysterious colour armour.

*End of Ruby's thought and back to the Blues*

"Ruby what do you see?" Weiss demanded.

"Enemies. LAME!" Ruby replied, "One's lightish red, the other's green and the last one is wearing a light yellow armour."

"There are three of them and three of us, but we still have the element of surprise..." As Weiss planned their plan of how to capture the enemies, Yang muttered, "I hope none of them is smart enough to call dibs."

"DIBS!" The lightish red one yelled.

"Dammit!" Yang angrily exclaimed.

*To the Reds*

"NORA!" Jaune shouted, "Why the heck did you yell?! Our enemies could be here!"

"Silly Jaune, you know that when you find something you have to yell dibs otherwise others will take it." Nora explained.

"What?! That's stupid!" Jaune bellowed still angry about her shouting earlier.

At that exact moment four Blues? jumped out of their hiding spot and aimed a sniper rifle, a pistol, a rocket launcher and a orange gun? At the Reds' heads.

"Freeze! Put your hands up!" A rich snobby voice roared.

"Yeah! Or we'll shoot, burn and blow you up!" Another voice that belonged to a young girl cried.

"Ruby!"

"Sorry it just felt right."

"Sorry doesn't make up for it."

"It does make us seem pretty cool though." The yellow girl declared.

"Estoy de acuerdo con la hermana del creador.(I agree with the creator's sister.)" A Spanish guy? Girl? Spoke loudly.

As the Reds' enemies argued with each other loudly, a seven feet tall monster silently moved towards them.

As quick as lightning the monster's hand lashed out and struck Yang across the jaw, flinging her a few feet back. Before anyone can do anything, an arm snaked its way around Weiss' neck effectively choking her out. Ren then tried to reach for his guns, but he wasn't fast enough for the monster because it sweeped Ren off his feet and punched him in the stomach as he was falling down, knocking him out instantly.

"Ren!" Nora yelped and rushed the monster with her own weapon, a giant two-handed hammer with a blade on one side and a heavy head on the other, before she can swing the colossal melee weapon, the monster quickly spun around and planted a foot deep in her stomach, making her gasped out in pain and passed out because of it.

Jaune, Ruby and the robot were what's left of their team, subconsciously Ruby jumped onto Jaune's arms, and as a result Jaune fell back out of fear and the sudden mass but he was caught by the robotic girl.

Seeing the preys, the monster slowly walked in their direction, making them literally quaking in their boots. The monster then extended its arms towards them but it was interrupted because Yang had tackled it to the ground from the back. A grunt was all that parted from its lips, and with that the brawl was on.

Punches after punches were traded between the two, not one was going to back down. Each punch was powerful enough to make the air around them shake and create small earthquakes as the chaos continued.


	4. Chapter 4: The fight is on!

_**I OWN NOTHING.**_

 _ **Rooster Teeth got everything not me.**_

Once upon a time,

*RUMBLE* [sound of rocks breaking]

There lived two great warriors,

*RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* [an earthquake shook the ground]

Their strengths were considered inhuman, some would even say that they were monsters in disguise.

*RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* *RUMBLE* [heavy breathing]

Even though,*CRASH* [sound of glass breaking] What the hell was that?!

"Oh hey!"

How did you get here?

"I don't know, first I was thrown across the canyon and the next thing I know I'm talking to a voice in my head."

I'm no voice, I'm a perfectly normal breathing human, thank you very much.

"Yeah yeah whatever, I got to go and fight some dude or monster in armour right now, so if you excuse me-" And with that the girl in bright yellow armour jumped out of the hole that she created.

Well that was a thing.

*Back to Yang*

As Yang plummeted to the ground, she thought to herself, 'I hope everyone is alright?'

*To the conscious members of the Reds and Blues*

"Hey red butbecauseofthedustyourarmourisnowlightyellow guy, don'taskmehowIknowbecauseIreallydon't."

What that Jaune picked up was, 'Hey red guy.'

"Yes the other red person with a rose on the front?" He answered

"Can you help me get everyone to safety?"

"Ok, just give me a moment."

"Oh, and can you put me down too?" She asked but with a meek but cute voice.

"What? I'm not carrying you." He answered dumbly.

"Look down."

True to her words, when Jaune looked down he saw that he was holding Ruby, bridal style, so he did the only thing that make sense to him. He dropped her immediately, because he didn't know how to deal accordingly.

"OW! What was that for?"

"I'm so sorry!" He apologised immediately, "I don't have any experience on how to deal with this, so I just did the first thing that came to my mind." He blurted out.

"¡Creador! Debería eliminar inmediatamente.(Creator! I should eliminate you immediately.)" The robot girl said in pure rage.

"No! And that's understandable, but next time try not to do it to me." She told Jaune while rubbing her sore bottom.

Before she could get up, Jaune extended an arm in front of her and asked, "Need a hand?" Before she accepted the offer, she flashed him a smile to showed that she appreciated it, but after realising that she's wearing helmet, she quickly chuckled instead, but she's still unsure if her helmet is on or not, so she did the first thing that came to her mind. She turned her head to the side and spat.

"Did you just spat inside your helmet?"

"Oh I thought that I wasn't wearing my helmet." She said with a great big blush on her face.

"You too? Man I'm so glad, I thought I was the only one with that problem." Jaune blurted out without realising.

"Wow that's awes-" *BOOM!* They quickly snapped their head towards the sound, only to see Yang slowly rising from the rubble.

*Yang's Point of View*

"Welp, that didn't go as planned." She slowly rose up after face planted on the ground because of the fall from earlier, "I feel like I forgetting something important."

*SMACK*

"Oh right the fight."  
"I suggest keeping your eyes in the fight." A gravelly voice said.

"What's the matter? Scare that I'm going to run away?" She asked in a teasing voice.

"Yes I've been looking for a good training partner for awhile now, you are much stronger than I have expected." The monster frankly responded.

"I don't know if I should be offended or happy that I just got a compliment from a 7 feet motherfucker or should I be scared?"

"All if you want, now let's continue with our fight."

"Now you're speaking my language."

"Language? I wasn't awa-" *SMACK*

"Now was that you teach me? Oh right keep your eyes in the fight." She mocked the monster while standing over it, using the advantage given to it. The monster immediately sweeped her feet, with unbelievable flexibility the monster manoeuvred its body in the air by using some break dancing move and managed to get to its feet, but not without kicking her face in the process.

"Gah! Ok that's it no more miss nice lady!"

She then started to rushed her opponent, a smirk formed on her opponent's face, then her opponent moved into a stance to counter her attack. Closing the distance between them, she raised her fist to strike her foe down, seeing this from a mile away her opponent instinctively raised its hands to intercept her fist, but what her combatant didn't expect was that she was hoping for this, spinning out of her adversary's grasp stunning it for a few seconds, she then proceed to let her fist kiss her foe's face.

Flying back a few feet because of sheer power, the monster tucked its legs in so it can perform a backward roll, putting in some distance between them.

"Hey catch!" Snapping its head up instantly only to see a medium sized rock flying straight for its face, the monster tried to move its head away from the thrown projectile, *CRACK*, but the rock still sailed straight into its face cracking the visor that was protecting its face. The monster stumbled back out of surprise that someone was able to crack its visor with a simple rock.

"Hah! *pant* How you like that? *pant* Bitch!" She taunted the monster between breath.

"To be honest, I'm surprise." It replied

"And?*pant*"

"What's your name?"

"Why?"

"I like to know my rival's name."

"Yang, yours?"

"Agent Georgia, now let's continue."

"I'm starting to like you more by the minute, when we're not trying to kill each other."

And with that exchange they both charged at each other for another fight, hoping that the next hit will end the brawl.

*Back to the now conscious members of Reds and Blues*

"Hey."

"Yeah?"

"Who do you think will win? Yang or the monster?"

"Definitely Yang!" A chirpy voice cried

"I beg to differ, the monster clearly seems like it have experience and your sister only have brute strength to back her up." A snobby voice argued

"Yes, experience is far better than brute strength." The voice of reason in the Reds army spoke

"But look at her, she's totally not a human, she sent a seven feet monster flying by punching it and cracking its visor by throwing a rock!" A blonde boy reasoned

"GO YELLOW WOMAN! BREAK ITS STUPID LEGS!" Nora cheered, "BUT SAVE SOME FOR ME! I STILL WANT REVENGE FOR HURTING MY RENNY!" Nora shouted without realising that her teammates and enemies heard every word.

"Creo que la lucha no continuará por mucho tiempo.(I think that the fight won't continue for long.)" The robot pointed out but silence greeted her instead.

*To the fight*

As we read, Agent Georgia and Yang's brawl continued, but something was wrong, the injury that Georgia received earlier is now taking its toll on him, and Yang had little energy left to continued for long.

"Oi gigantor, you ok to continue? You look like you will die if I smack your ass again." Yang stated

"You look like you just ran a marathon, three times, without a break." Georgia pointed out

"I can keep going for about twenty minutes before my body give up."

"I can keep this up **all** **day**." Georgia lied wishing that Yang will buy it and get discouraged about fighting him head on.

'Guess if I want to win then I'll have to u-.' Before he could finished, Yang decided to rushed him to delivered an earth shattering punch intending on finishing the fight with a single punch.

He jumped back to avoided the punch, then he activated his trump card, a small compacted jetpack on his back, and rocketed at top speed straight at her.

Due to the brief confusion, he managed to headbutted her helmet, cracking her visor and knocking her flat on her back, due to her lack of energy she clumsily tried to get back up but her arms collapsed from her mass instead.

Seeing their friend and enemy in trouble the Reds and Blues promptly made a silent truce and a plan in their mind.

"Ren Nora, go distract it as long as you can, I'll stay and see if we have bigger guns to take it down." Jaune ordered, Ren and Nora jumped into action straight away without waiting for a second order.

"You Blues got any big gun or car we can use?" He asked

"We have the Going Merry which is a car and have a chain gun on the back." Ruby spoke and Weiss nodded at the bit of information.

"Great, oh and by the way, is any you, by any chance a sniper?" Jaune questioned

*Meanwhile with Ren and Nora*

"Alright Nora get behind him for a sneak attack, I'll distract him with my guns. We'll keep it busy until further orders arrive." Ren commanded

"You got it! Not-fearless-leader-Jaune!" Nora chanted in a child-like voice

*Inside Georgia's mind*

That's it. I did it. Got to admit that girl is something all right. Can't believe that I'm nearly beaten by a girl. You know she reminds me of someone, an old loveable giant *Ping* Shit ambush *He jumped behind a rock nearby and peek around the corner* Damn double wielding SMGs green-horn kid, and damn giant hammer wielding pink girl. Wait what? *He got surprise attacked by Nora, sending him through the rock he was behind and into an open space* Urgh, damn, how the hell was she able to carry that damn thing? *He got up to his feet* Where the hell are they hiding now? And what in Sam's hell is that *He looked to his right* CAR?! *He dived to the side avoiding oncoming car* These kids don't play anymore. Hah fine, I'll use my jetpack and beat these punks up again and go home for dinner. *He fired up his jetpack* *BANG* *Ping* Please don't tell me that was a sniper round piercing its way in my jetpack and destroying my newly bought jetpack. *He looked at his back* OH FUCK ME UP MY ASSHOLE IT IS! *Then he rocketed straight up into the atmosphere* SON OF A BITCH!

[To this day, no one was able to find his body and confirm his death, so they just assumed the worst]

*To our Reds and Blues*  
"OMG THAT WAS AWESOME! We should really do this again." Ruby merrily cheered while coming out of her hiding spot

"The plan works? I can't believe it, it really work, I-" As Jaune rambled on, Yang slowly got up, "Urgh, I think I found another level of hangover." She dumbly stated

"Yang! You just missed out on our **second** victory!" Ruby said while holding up a peace sign with her hand

"Ruby, raiding a cookie factory and not get caught by our parents **doesn't** count as a victory." Yang sighed

"It totally does!" Ruby argued

"Anyway, what'd I miss?" Yang questioned

"Cuando fue eliminado por tu enemigo, Weiss, Jaune, Ren, Nora y Ruby todos trabajaron juntos para llevar a cabo la amenaza. Yo ayudé a lograr que el Going Merry listo para el combate.(When you were knocked out by your foe, Weiss, Jaune, Ren, Nora and Ruby all worked together to take out the threat. I helped by getting the Going Merry ready for combat.)" The robot explained.

"Anyone else beside mechanical girl there, please I need some info." Yang declared.

"Don't worry, we still love you." Ruby comforted the depressed mechanic of the crew, while shooting Yang a death stare.

"We eliminate the enemy while you were taking a nap." Weiss coldly answered.

"Wow that's cold Weiss." Yang stated, "I guess you can even say-"

"Don't you dare!" Weiss shouted, and Ruby quickly moved to cover her mouth and hopefully minimise the damage, but she was too late.

Yang then pulled out a pair of aviator glasses out of thin air and put them on, "She's Weiss-cold."

At the mention of the pun, everyone instantly groaned, even Nora, who's known to not give two shits about anything. Everyone groaned all except two, one of them chuckled instead of groaning.

"Jaune?" Everybody suddenly questioned their new friend and leader's sanity including our metal friend, excluding Yang and Ren of course.

"I think I just found my new best friend!" Yang announced while looking at Jaune like he's the incarnation of Jesus Christ jumping on a pogo stick.

"Does anyone know our new teammate's location?" Ren, being the voice of reason, raised a question.

*Meanwhile high in outer space*

"How did we get lost again? Actually the real question is, why did I let you fly the vehicle?" A tired voice queried.

"Well after driving for a long extended period of time, you looked like you can fall asleep on the control panel, so I volunteered to drive for you instead, you agreed and now we're lost in outer space." Another voice explained.

"I swear that will be the last time I let my guard down."

"If you want I can give you a back rub or do you prefer a stomach rub?"

" **NO!** "


	5. Chapter 5: Punny Time

_**Rooster Teeth have ownership not me.**_

Warning: If you don't like puns **please leave**.

"Yang, please, stop." Ruby begged

"Why? My puns are _cool_ **."**

"If you're making a fool out of me, I wil-"

"Hey I'm not trying to _ice_ -solate ya from the rest of the crew, so why don't you just _chill_?"

"IMBECILE!"

"Hey calm down, take a _chill_ pill and have some _Weiss_ -cream instead, okay?"

"Can I please break her legs? Just a tiny bit, please?."

"I wouldn't do that if I were you, it is un- _Weiss_."

*groan* *achoo*

'Uh-oh.'

"Did someone just _Schnee-_ ze?"

*groan*

"I think I going to be sick." Ruby said with a green face

"Sis what's wrong?! Don't give up! _Yang_ in there!" Yang frantically yelled

"You're the sickness that is plaguing me right now." And with that comment she quickly left

"I know that some of my puns are cheesy, but they're _punny_ right?"

"We should really have some kind of law for bad puns."

"What?! Why do you want to _pun-_ nish me?"

"That is exactly why." Nora yelled while pointing her index finger at Yang's face

"Hey just because I like puns doesn't mean I should be _pun_ -nished, but if you can relax for a bit I'm sure you and I will have a _Yang_."

"I think I'll retire for the day." Weiss declared while making a disgusted face

"Renny? Do you want to join me?" Nora asked with a tire face, but Ren was sleeping standing up? Stand-sleeping? Sleep-standing?

"Hm, guess he's _egg_ -xhausted." Yang said while holding an egg

"Stop making me laugh, you'll make me _puma_ pants." Jaune decided to join in on the fun by making an _egg_ -cceptable pun.

Oh God, it's spreading, please send help!

*sniff* "I'm so happy right now."

"Why?" Jaune dumbly asked

"It all because you're here with me." Yang answered rather poorly

"What?"

"I've found my soulmate."

"Say what now?"

"Do you know _Xiao-Long_ I've waiting for you?" She asked

"Are you saying that you're _egg_ -xcited to see me?" He asked while still clinging on to that god-forsaken egg

"The classic egg puns huh? I can respect that."

"Hey have you ever try coffee before?"

"Yeah, after I try some coffee, people call me a caf- _fiend_ addict."

"Ha ha ha! Good one." Jaune complimented

"I know right? A world without puns is a _cat_ -tastrophe." Yang added while clutching a cat picture

YANG XIAO-LONG!

"What the?" Yang uttered, snapping her head behind her to see who had shouted her name, but nothing was what she saw

"Hey you ok? Is something wrong?" Jaune queried

"Did you hear someone shouting my name?"

"No why?"

I HAVE HAD IT WITH YOUR HORRIBLE SENSE OF HUMOR.

"There it is again."

"There what is again?" Jaune asked while questioning his new friend sanity

I HEREBY CURSE YOU WITH THE FIRE FROM THE DEPTH OF HELL.

"Wait wh-" Yang didn't even get to finish her sentence before her head was set on fire by some mysterious forces. In an instant she was no longer conscious and fell face first onto the _warm_ hard ground.

And Jaune did what seemed right at that moment, he shrieked at the top of his lungs, waking Ren up and gaining everyone's attention, who rushed out immediately to see what was wrong.

"What th-?" Ren muttered but no one was able to hear him because everyone was yelling like there was no tomorrow.

*To the pun haters*

"OH GOD! YANG! NO!" Ruby howled with pain like she was the one who was on fire instead

"What in Oum's name happened here?!" Weiss demanded

"Fire? Fire!" Nora ask-yelled?

"I don't know, at first she was fine, the next fire erupted from her head." Jaune tried to explain but all he did was added more fuel to the fire

"There's no way a normal human can set on fire at will." Weiss argued

Nora then squinted her eyes and asked, "Are you hiding something?"

"Wha-" Jaune tried to explain but he was cut off

"Someone go and get some water!" Ruby bellowed finally knocking some senses into everyone standing there, but there was one problem

"We don't have any source of water here." Nora pointed out

"Yes, the only water source we have, is from command." Ren stated

Weiss then get in his personal space and interrogated, "How did you know about our water condition?"

"Spying." Ren answered which earned him an embarrassed Weiss, "Did you-?"

"I'm not a peeping tom."

"Guys **focus!** " Ruby cried while pouring her ration of water on Yang's head trying to put out the raging fire, but it did nothing to calm the furious fire

"Um, any suggestion?" Jaune was the first to ask

"Nothing except pouring all of our water on her head." Weiss and Ren said at the same time

"He encontrado una fuente de agua cercana, ... procesando ... procesando ... Está a ocho metros a la izquierda de donde estamos ahora, seis metros hacia abajo.(I've found a nearby water source,...processing...processing...It is eight metres to the left of where we are right now, six metres straight down.)" The engineer spoke but all she got were confused stares from Ren and Weiss, Ruby seemed to know what our poor metal said.  
"You guys heard her-" But she was cut off by Nora

"The nearest water hole is eight metres to the left of where we are right now, six metres straight down. Let's move!" She yelled and grabbed her hammer, running to the coordinate given to her

*SLAM* *heave* *SLAM* *heave* *SLAM* *heave*

"Nora, I don't think slamming your hammer *SLAM* *heave* against the ground is *SLAM* *heave* working." Ren tried to reason with her but it proved to be useless *SLAM* *heave*

"Well we don't have much *SLAM* *heave* time, and I have a feeling we don't need *SLAM* *heave* a shovel." And with that comment, she then raised her fearsome warhammer over her head, "RARGH!" She yelled and with one last desperate attempt, she struck the ground with a force that can turned a skyscraper to dust.

The ground that Nora was standing on, cracked and wheezed, but,

…

…

"Oh no,..." Nora muttered and tried to raise her hammer once more but she wasn't able to because her energy is running low, with no hope in sight she promptly collapsed to her knees and tears quickly filled her eyes.

Weiss and Ren soon realised what happened when Nora collapsed to her knees, they then looked around to find help but stopped when their eyes fell on the engineer of the crew.

"Pero no se preocupe, puedo cuidar de las cosas de aquí ahora. Por favor sacarla del sitio de excavación.(please don't worry, I can take care of things from here now. Please remove her from the excavation site.)"

Instead of Ren or Weiss speaking, it was Nora who spoke, "Are you sure?"

"Soy un cien por ciento seguro, no se preocupe el enemigo de mi maestro. Estoy listo combatir.(I'm a hundred percent certain, do not worry the enemy of my master. I am combat ready.)" The robot replied with determine that seemed to illuminated from its body.

"What does she? Want?" Ren asked Nora but all he got was a confusing answer from her

"Just get me outta here, she will take care of the rest."

Weiss seemed to get the message and together they quickly pulled her and her weapon away from the danger zone.

While they were busy with carrying Nora, the robotic mechanic then grabbed a grenade, checked that everyone was out of the blast radius, pulled the pin out and dropped the explosive onto the weaken ground. *BOOM* And the ground shattered instantly from the blast of the grenade, revealing a large pool filled with water.

"Thank you," Nora said while jumping for joy, "Um,..."

"No tengo un nombre, pero mi creador me llamo una bonita Energética Nueva Joven nervioso o P.E.N.N.Y si desea no me llame por lo que estoy asigno.(I don't have a name, but my creator call me a Pretty Energetic New Nervous Youngster or P.E.N.N.Y if you wish to not call me by what I'm assign to.)" Penny explained

"Right, thanks Penny?" Nora thanked her?

"Ah, y soy también una muchacha.(Oh and I'm also a girl.)"

"Right, thanks again Penny," Nora thanked her but she also raised a question, "So how do we get the water here?"

"No se preocupe compañero persona que habla español, he preparado para esta situación.(worry not fellow spanish speaking person, I've prepared for this situation.)" Penny then pulled a bucket that is bigger than her and some ropes out of thin air, tied the bucket and the ropes together and lower the items to the bottom of the pool.

After confirming that she has secured her objective, she swiftly but carefully pulled the bucket of water up, succeeding in securing the pail of water she gave it to Ren and Weiss to take it back to the others while she carried Nora and her gigantic weapon, since she is the strongest out of the three.

When they got back to Yang, they got to work immediately,

*SPLASH* [sound of water putting out a fire] *gasp* And Yang yelled, "DON'T YOU DAR-" But she was interrupted by Ruby because Ruby flung herself onto Yang.

"Yang, *sniff* I'm so glad!" Was all Ruby managed to say while choking on tears of joy

"You gave us quite the scare, you dunce."

"Please don't get set on fire again."

"What happened? And why are you guys hanging around me like I was in a coma or something?" Yang asked but the responses that she got were shocked faces.

"Yang? Are you feeling alright?" Jaune asked

"I'm perfectly fine why?"

"Don't you feel a little _hot_ under the helmet? Pun was totally not intended by the way. And when did you change your helmet?" Jaune asked


	6. Chapter 6: Trouble

_**RWBY belonged to Rooster Teeth.**_

*In a red and white spaceship*

"Sir! We have found our target!"

"Where is it?"

"In a box canyon sir!"

"Prepare to move out!"

"Sir yes sir!"

*To our heroes*

"I know we're in a hot box canyon and all, but that was a bad pun and I'm still wearing the sa-" Yang stated

"So you're not feeling hot under the helmet at all?" Jaune interrupted

"Yes, no hot feelings under my helmet."

"So you're not hot at all?"

"Yes I'm not h-" Yang paused, realising her mistake

"Is something wrong?!" Jaune immediately asked

"Please don't die!" Ruby yelled

"I don't like fire, so please don't set yourself on fire." Nora added

"I mean, I'm not hot under my helmet," She quickly corrected, "And why are you talking about me dying? Also I'm not a pyromaniac."

"So no pain or any side effect at all?" Surprisingly it was Ren who asked her that question

"Yes, a hundred percent nothing, no problemo, and why are you all acting like *Ren showed her a mirror* worrywarts…" [sound of a body hitting the floor] And she fainted on the spot

An hour later

"Ugh, my head…" Yang murmured

The first thing that she felt, was the warmth of the petite girl that she knew, Ruby, "Yang! Oh thank god, you're awake!" Followed up by, "Oh thank god, you have all of us worried." And, "Yay yellow lady isn't on fire anymore." With, "How are you alive?" Furthermore, "Este es un caso raro de hecho, el paciente no sufre ningún daño de fuego.(This is a strange case indeed, the patient isn't suffering from any fire damage.)"

"Interesting, her brain is not suffering from any burn damage, rather she's perfectly healthy, a strange bunch of people indeed." Ren observed

"You too buddy, and what was that about burn damage? Wait! Did someone touch my hair with fire?!" Yang yelled

"Rest assure my friend, no one would touch your hair." Ren said with a tone that screamed 'I'm a mad scientist!'

"He is quite right," A voice to Yang's right spoke, "No one would even think of going near a strand of your hair."

"Hey! Up yours princess, I'll have you know that my lustrous mane is the best around." Yang commented

"Whatever to lull you to bed at night." Weiss snided

"Yeah well at least I've bigger boo-"

Before Yang could finished her sentence a spaceship came into view and a booming voice spoke

"This is the White Fang! Drop your weapons or we will fire!"

"Why can't I just say something before someone come and interrupt me?!" Yang angrily yelled at nobody in particular, which caused everyone around her to think that she was really losing her marbles

"Do we comply? Or not?" Jaune asked outloud

"Well we're not going to stand here and do nothing while they take our place." Yang stated

"Thank you, Yang, for pointing out the obvious." Weiss remarked

"Hey no problem, by the way Weiss do you think that I can help with that _small_ problem that you have?" Yang emphasised the word 'small' to try and make her point, which earned her an angry Weiss

"The nerve! How da-"

Ruby yelled, "Guys, focus, we can deal with Yang's problem later, but right now we have those guys to deal with," She then gestured to the spaceship, "We don't know their intentions yet, the way they spoke doesn't seem very friendly, we need to know what causes them to come here and fast, so who's the most stealthy here?"

All heads then turn to the warrior clad in green armour, "I wonder if I can harvest that power." The warrior muttered

"Renny?" Nora then leaned towards him and whispered, "You're going into your 'mad scientist' mode again."

"Oh my sincere apologies," He gave a bow, "How may I help you?"

"Well at least someone have some manners," Weiss then shot Yang a glare, "We were wondering if you can get some information on our uninvited guests."

"It will be my pleasure." And with that Ren started to jog to the spaceship

"Is he going to be alright?" Ruby asked

"Trust me, stealth is and will always be his strong suit." Jaune assured her

"But what if he got caught by them?" Ruby queried, "They seem very unfriendly like."

"Well if it makes you any better, there's this one time where our whole team were playing 'hide-and-seek' because we were bored out of our minds, an-"

"You guys play hide-and-seek?! Why didn't you invite me? I've been trying to get my team to play with me but no one would." Ruby then slumped her shoulders making her look like a child, whose toys were wrongfully taken away by the parents

"I promise to invite all of you to play hide-and-seek with me next time, when we're not trying to kill each other, I would greatly appreciate that." Jaune promised, which got him a very cheerful Ruby

"Really? *nod* Oh ThankyouThankyouThankyou," Ruby rushed over to Jaune and gave him the biggest bear hug of all time while making little squeals out of pure joy, but she wanted to hear the rest of his story about his team so she broke off the hug and asked, "Anyway, what happened in 'hide-and-seek'?"

"Where was I? Oh yes, I was 'it' first, so I have to go and look for everyone and stuff, Nora was my first victim, did you know where she tried to hide? *shake head* She tried to hide _**under**_ a rock, I think it was a boulder, anyway getting off topic, so I found her first because she was making all these weird noise under a rock, and Ren? Oh man he was a doozy. Two hours of searching high and low and we found absolutely nothing, not even a clue of his hiding spot, eventually we give in and called his name to show him that we give up. Then he just appeared out of thin air behind us and when we asked where he was hiding he answered,..." Jaune then paused for dramatic effect

"Where? Where? Where did he hide?" Ruby took the bait and practically begged for an answer

"He was,"

"Yes?"

"Hiding,"

"Uh-huh?"

"Under a table."

…

…

…

…

…

"Wuht?"

And that ladies and gents was when Ruby's brain just shut down from utter shock, confusion, awe and confusion, temporarily taking her ability to speak like a normal human being

"I know right? That was my first reaction too, it was unbelievable and to this day it still flabbergast me." Jaune stated

Finally recovered from her initial shock she decided to not ask about the incident incase it might give her insanity so she changed the topic, "Flabbergast is a word?"

"Duh, it's totally a word." Jaune answered with a smirk, "Didn't you learn it in school?"

"I went to a very good school thank you very much, and flabbergast is not a word."

"Is"

"Is not"

"Is"

"Is not"

" **Is"**

" **Is not"**

" **Is!"**

" **Is not!"**

" **Is!"**

" **Is not!"**

They both turned their backs to each other, "Hmph!" Was what indicated the end of their conversation and the beginning of the name calling, right now they're at a stalemate

Ruby was the one to break off the stalemate and fired the first shot, "Blind man."

"Colour blind girl."

"Dusty boy."

"Scaredy cat."

"Weak guy."

"Spitty."

"Pun enjoyer."

"Shorty."

"Jerk!"

But before he could counter her, he felt something very hot beside his head, turning his head to the side he came face-to-face with Yang, before he could yelped she leaned in and whispered, "Don't talk about height around her will ya? She's a bit self conscious about it."

"Oh, I'm sorry Ruby that was uncalled for."

"Nah it's cool, I should be the one to apologise anyway."

"For?"

"Calling you blind, I mean I doubt that I will have better luck finding him in hide-and-seek."

"I doubt anyone will."

"Hehe, so we're cool right?"

"Yeah, we're cool."

But because the plo- er..., I mean the coincidences that often happened in their world, a space aeroplane on fire came crashing in from orbit.

" **GODAMMIT!"**


	7. Chapter 7: Teammates here!

_**Rooster Teeth owned Rwby**_

"What the heck was that thing that just fell out of the sky?" Jaune asked the air around him

And as fast as lightning Penny appeared beside Jaune and said, "Esa era la nave de 77 Heavy-portador de la tropa o D77H-TCI, para abreviar.(That was The Dropship 77 Heavy-Troop Carrier or D77H-TCI for short.)"

"Um, translation please."

"i siento mucho, pero eso es algo que no está en mi programa.(i am terribly sorry, but that is something that is not in my programme.)"

"Are you saying that the thing that just fell out of the sky is a meteorite?"

"Oh my god, this is an alien invasion!"

"What?"

"Don't you watch any movie? This is how aliens start invading!"

"Creo que el 'meteorito' del que hablas se llama la nave de 77 Heavy-portador de la tropa, y no hay forma posible la vida podría haber sobrevivir a la caída.(I believe that the 'meteorite' that you speak of is called the Dropship 77 Heavy-Troop Carrier, and no possible life form could have survived that fall.)"

"We're gonna die!"

"I don't want to be a guinea pig for the alien's horrific experiment!"

"por favor calmate.(please calm down.)"

"The alien is gonna be like that fascist dude in the war!"

"I don't wanna go to war and be evil like him!"

*In the spaceship*

"Soldier, report."

"Most of the enemy forces are outside their base, except for the spy who was found near the security room."

"What are they planning?"

"They're planning to create a fascist government, do horrific experiments on guinea pig and go to war."

"Savages, tell the crew to prepare for war and keep an eye on that spy."

"Sir yes sir!"

*Outside of the spaceship*

Prepare yourself, for the Ice Queen comes

"What in Oum's name are you two knuckleheads yelling about?!"

And Jaune replied with, "Aliens! Experiment! Dying! Preparing for it!"

"There is no such thing as alien."

Then Ruby got in Weiss' face, pointed at the crash site and yelled, "Then what do you call that?!"

Right on cue, a low growl was emitted from the crash, making Ruby and Jaune to yelp and hug each other in fear, "Well Weiss? Do you have anything to say?"

"It's just the groaning of the metal. Here I'll show you, Penny come with me, I need someone who knows a bit about machine. So hopefully the dunces will trust me."

"Por supuesto amigo Weiss.(Of course friend Weiss.)"

"I'll take that as a yes."

"Well you two go on ahead and get kill by the alien, while the smart one, me and Ruby, will stay right here and not get kill by the alien."

"Guys?"

"Yeah?"

"If I don't come back in five minutes, warn the others."

"You do believe!" Jaune and Ruby roared at the same time

But Weiss ignored them and walked towards the crash plane

"Wait Weiss! Wait for us!"

"Don't walk towards your death!"

"Eso no fue muy amable de su parte, Weiss.(That wasn't very nice of you, Weiss.)" Penny whispered in Weiss' ear

As the trio approached the ruin space plane, the low growl was once more emitted from the wreckage

Ruby then whimpered, "We're gonna die a horrible death."

And Weiss snapped at her, "Hush! There is nothing," suddenly the plane shifted and a hunched figures covered in crimson red armour climbed out of the wreckage, carrying another in brown armour on one shoulder, "here."

On that day, the scream of pure fear echoed across the universe

"W-w-w-hat the hell is that?" Weiss screamed while pointing at the mysterious figure before her

But no one answered her because they were busy dealing with their own little panic attack

"We're gonna die!"

"They're gonna annihilate us then they're gonna conquer us then they're gonna,..." [sound of Ruby collapsing out out of sheer terror]

"No puedo creer que tiene razón acerca de la existencia de extraterrestres.(I can't believe that you are right about the existence of aliens.)"

"Truly amazing."

"OH MY GOD THEY'RE NEXT TO US!"

"Oh no, enemigo Jaune no es el extranjero, es su asociado de Ren.(Oh no, enemy Jaune it's not the alien, it's your associate Ren.)"

Upon hearing 'Ren' Jaune sprang up immediately, "Ren thanks god you're here."

"Alien? Yes I am aware of that."

"Yes that and that mission that we told you to go on. Did you find anything? And who's that giant behind you?"

"This is a prisoner that I've found on the ship, his name is Yatsuhashi."

"Ya-who?"

"You may call him Frank."

"Oh"

"We also have a hostage."

*In the spaceship*

"Sir we have a problem."

"What is it?"

"The green spy that we caught has escape, freed a fellow prisoner and got Velvet as a hostage."

"How? We've put him in a cell that have cameras in it!"

*To the heroes*

"Wow, so that's how you and him escape the spaceship with a hostage screaming her head off while running through a corridor full of people."

"You're not going to ask me questions?"

"After working with you Ren, I've learned a very important lesson."

"And that would be?"

"If I think something is impossible to do, you will be the one who, somehow, someway, with the help of some magical being from above, will find a way to do the so call impossible thing."

Suddenly a voice spoke behind them, "Excuse me but can you please help me? The lady in white armour won't utter a word. I think she needs some therapy."

"Yeah sure what do you-" Jaune turned around to take a better look at the questioner and [sound of him collapsing] he passed out

"Oh my! We must help him right away. Green warrior, do you know where the nearest medic is?"

"Truly fascinating. A Sangheili Ultra is not attacking me."

"You must have misheard me, the nearest medic, where is he?"

"Helping a human? Now this is a first."

"You are of no help. You there, giant man and little girl, do you know where the nearest medic is?"

"Lo siento, pero no tenemos una estación médico aquí.(I'm sorry but we don't have a medic station here.)"

Frank just shaked his head

"Um, excuse me but I can help you with the wounded." A meek voice behind Frank cried

"Yes that would be greatly appreciated."

"And please let me down."

"As you wish." Frank responded with a rough voice

 _ **An hour later: In Red base**_

"Ugh, wha happe?"

"Oh thank goodness, you're finally awake, you black out because of shock."

"Why did I pass out?"

"The reason would be me."

"Why would I pass out because of ALIEN!"

"Please don't yell, I wish no harm upon you."

"No harm?"

"Yes no harm."

"Oh that's reassuring, I thought you were going to enslave all of us."

"What? No! I'm just here to bridge the gap between my people and yours."

"Aw man, Ruby and everyone is gonna flip when they see you. Wait what do you mean by bridging the gap between my and your people."

Before the elite can explain, "Jaune!"

"Ruby! Hey in here!"

Without any greeting she started with, "Jaune! You ok? What happened? I was knocked out through the whole thing so I couldn't see. What happened? And who took care of you? We don't have a medic or a doctor. I mean there's no real difference, but who cares you're ok! And I'm really glad."

"I'm sorry if I have frighten you and your friends."

Ruby spun around in confusing, "Huh? Who's ther- Sweet mother of cookies, there's an alien in front of me. Please I don't wanna be enslaved for the rest of my life. We can um,... trade, yeah, trading, I'll make cookies for you if you let me go free."

"Ruby,"

But she continued, "Please have mercy. I promise you that my cookies are the bestest that you have ever taste."

"Ruby the rea-,"

And so on, "Wait that's right, I have a car, do you want a car? Probably not, because you probably have a purple hover thingy instead, which is much cooler."

"Please calm down."

"Oh right, I forgot why I come here, Jaune, troubles are brewing, bad people are coming with lots of weapons and planes. Which is awesome, this is just like that time when I went to a gun store."

"RUBY!"

"Ah please dad, I won't try to steal guns by stuffing them down my pants anymore, please don't take my secret cookies stash away and give them to Yang."

Ruby then grabbed on to the elite's right leg and do the biggest puppy dog eyes ever, but the elite wasn't fazed by it and asked, "Where are the enemies?"

"They're outside." Ruby replied in a meek voice

"Please stay here, I have to dispatch the enemies."

"By yourself?"

"Don't worry I won't take long."


End file.
